19 February, 2009

My feelings...

I know that I’m not supposed to be so grumpy about this. This is nothing compared to others. But I just need to let the feelings out instead of have it buried inside me.

I hate the fact that I have to live with this routine. I miss my quality time with my dear hubby and adorable kids, I miss my baking, I miss my sewing. And it’s been ages since the last time I watched my favorite TV series. I used to live in a comfort zone for 3 years. My previous work place is just 15 minutes away from home. I only went out for work at 8.30am and reached home as early as 5.30pm. Now every thing has changed. I had new job so as my routine. It took me more hours away from home. I only have 4 ½ hours (provided I go to sleep by 12am) every day to cope with everything, i.e. kids, house chores, etc. The sad thing is, Hubby is the one who always left a little bit behind. I really hate my self for this. How about weekends? I don’t have any solid weekend at home. We have that so called “compulsory visit”.

Yes, I need a helper! I need a servant or what we called MAID or BIBIK. It doesn’t mean I’ll depend too much on them. But their existence will definitely ease my burden. I’ll get my life back.

I have other idea in mind, actually (and few more). To let go my carrier and transform into SAHM or WAHM (huhu… am I too carried away with Samantha Sweeting in “The Undomestic Goddess” book???). Can we survive with only one person earnings? What work or business can I generate from home? I don’t have any clue at all. Seem like I have to sweep away that brilliant idea.

Oo Merciful Allah, I seek your guidance… only You know what are the best for me….

1 comment:

zufa said...

i'm stucked with that "compulsory visit" too. but i think i'm learning to say "no" lately.

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